Faded Flower
by frozenmoogle
Summary: Virgil finds himself at the church, trying to find out why he led himself here. FebroniaxVirgil oneshot.


This is about Febronia and Virgil; therefore it's the pairing for this fic! I deeply apologize if they're out of character. I haven't had a ton of experience with them. Reviews are wonderful! And no flames allowed.

I would guess it's meant to be in Episode III.

Oh right…

Disclaimer: I own no parts of Xenosaga, if I DID, I would make all the characters' favorite food applesauce!!!

Virgil: Applesauce…?

Me: Yes, like the color of your hair!

Virgil: ...

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I found myself at the church outside of Miltia again one night. Why was I here? Some part of me told me to go here, another part told me to stay away. So, why exactly was I here…? My mind suddenly burst into a thousand ideas and thoughts for the reason of me being here, each and every one relating to…

No, my mind rumbled vigorously with anger. Why should I be here because of her? She left me, in the most horrible way. Maybe she deserved it.

_She died protecting you._

No, she didn't. She left me intentionally.

_You're denying your true feelings._

Feelings? Hah, what feelings? I don't feel anything.

_The ones locked away._

Locked away? I'm aware of everything with myself.

_Why don't you realize it then?_

Realize what?

_Realize the reason you came here._

There is no reason.

_Don't pain yourself._

How would I?

_By being aware of the truth, and throwing it away._

The truth is she left me.

_No._

Yes it is: she left me!

I was getting infuriated with myself, two parts of me arguing why I was here. For years, I avoided to think about her, only referring to her as pronouns.

Today, I would break that streak of pronouns. I dared to speak her name, the reason I was here.

"Febronia…" My mind felt lighter, as did my body. It was as if a great weight had been lifted from me, but… Why?

"Virgil." A soft voice, was it…?

My head jolted upwards, eyes desperately scanning the abandoned church, looking.

What was I rushing for? Why was I rushing? I was desperate for her. It was as if I couldn't control my body, but I didn't want to listen to my head. Right now, all that mattered was…

"Febronia?" Silence.

It was my imagination: it was always my imagination. I mentally scolded myself for showing emotion for her. Why did I suddenly break out right then? My back turned to face the altar, and I started to walk to the aged door.

"Virgil." I came to a halt.

"It's not you." My voice managed to stay firm.

"Luis…" I had to turn around, as much I didn't want to, but I did so.

It had been so long since I've seen her, it felt to me that she'd changed, but it was myself who had done the changing. Her hair the soft silver like healthy dried flowers: beautiful but dead, and the same dress I saw her when she nurtured me at my near-death experience.

But there was one thing that stood out most to me: her eyes. There was no way I could deny my thoughts of them: beautiful, the liquid gold shimmering at me.

No, I was overusing the term 'beautiful', or anything relating to it. I shook my head, trying to rush the thought out.

But the thought was standing in front of me.

"Luis… You've returned." Her eyes were deep, staring into mine. I wanted to close my eyes, but it had been so long since. They didn't close on command.

"Febronia. It's not you."

"It is." She still remained calm.

"No! NO!" My voice blew into yelling.

"Luis…"

"You left me. You died and left me!" I was yelling, and I felt like I was holding back tears.

That's when she embraced me.

"It's okay, Luis."

"No, it's not. You're dead…" That was it; I couldn't control my voice any longer. It was shaking with, sadness maybe…? No, I believe it was grief.

"I'm still alive inside of you." Alive in my mind and heart?

"I'm… sorry Febronia. I, I couldn't save you." Great, I was apologizing now. I had to though; it was my fault for her death.

"It's alright Luis."

"No it's not! You… You're…" She hugged me tighter.

"Luis, can we stay like this… Just for a minute?" Her head tilted up to look into my eyes.

"…" My eyes closed as I embraced her back, and put my chin in her hair. "Yes."

Even though she was but a spirit, I still felt her warmth like from long ago.

_When sunlight gold and icy water blue mix, a new warmth radiates within._

_

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Yay! I hope you like it, and I do deeply apologize if they're out of character… Please review, no flamies please! But tips would be good too.

And if you don't understand the last sentence, it refers to the colors of their eyes. So when they mix, that new warmth is a great happiness! It might sound stupid… But oh well. I hope you liked it!


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